-2004-
HackFest XVI at Hershey
The Pennsylvania Dutch Country
HF2004 Site: August 9-12
&
Gen. A.P. Hill
photo by J.P. Marion
A ragtag squad of HackFesters, missing pixels and all, infiltrated the Cashtown Inn, General A.P. Hill's
Confederate Headquarters in Cashtown, PA, about 8 miles west of Gettysburg. Legend has it that the General's spirit still inhabits the property, but nobody was about to believe that rebel bunkum. Note framed portrait of Eiffel Tower on left, a purely coincidental tribute to the missing Nicole, whose well-documented interest in the Civil War was eclipsed by the opportunity to hang out in France for a few weeks....
Just another day at HF'04.
Chris, Mary Ella, and Maggie cruise on the Coal Cracker, one of Hershey Park's primo collection of ten roller coasters. Note Maggie, having already experienced this ride some 386 times in her young life, catching a quick catnap along the way. She was later carried to another coaster, SooperDooperLooper, where, still asleep, she was placed aboard to continue her snooze. BELOW: More of the same with Mavourneen and Amira.
Roller Gurlz
HackFest '04 Mascot?
"You say sickadah and I say sickaduh...I say tomatoe and you say tomaduh...sickaduh, tomaduh...." Everything you need to know about the little creature who tormented, er, entertained us with its incessant song at the Four Seasons. (Hand model: Alayna Stagg)
Gettysburg, PA -- JP talks over the Gettysburg Address with a beautifully bronzed Abraham Lincoln, suggesting that instead of "Fourscore and seven years ago," he just come out and say "87 years ago." Abe guffawed, belted JP a good one squarely on the back, and exclaimed, "You want me to shorten the shortest speech I ever gave? Haw, haw, haw, now that's a good one!!!" Looking on is actor George Hamilton, another sun worshipper.
The Cashtown Inn: Our historic home in near Gettysburg (note ghost of Virginia Wade -- the only civilian casualty of the battle -- stepping off porch and moving airily, if not eerily, toward our van).
photo by JP Marion
A portion thereof of the cousin contingent whiles away the waning minutes of HackFest '04 on the veranda of the Cashtown Inn. This hidden camera was used to keep an eye on card shark Matt Marion, whose feats of prestidigitation are notorious along the Eastern Seaboard. Note slick "palming" of the winning ace of spades and the utter obliviousness of his naive and trusting opponents.
Ghost Album
A petrified Logan & a mortified Maggie leafing with palpable trepidation through the notorious Cashtown Inn Ghost Album, as Michael J, his knees knocking in utter and complete horror, looks on. Just out of sight, incidentally, around the corner on the left, hovers the spirit of Confederate corporal Elbert Deakes, who passed away 141 years ago last summer on that very veranda. It was an inglorious end to poor Deakes who, having miraculously survived the Battle of Gettysburg, choked to death a day later on a chard of beef jerky after falling asleep while in the act of chewing. He was, by the way, seated in the same rocking chair occupied here by one Maggie Marion.
HF'04: Gettin' down with those wild and crazy Amish homies.
A visit to Pennsylvania's Lancaster region puts visitors right in the heart of Amish country.
Here's a town that nobody of consenting age should miss.
Of course.
While the more frivolous members of the family blithely went off seeking cheap thrills at Hershey Park, these three ultra-sophisticates partook of a cultural quest that enabled them to truly experience the area...shoo fly pie and other regional specialties, well-tended Amish farms in stunningly picturesque settings, the very popular villages of Intercourse and Bird-in-the-Hand, and quaint covered bridges on sparsely traveled back roads....There is no question that the above-pictured trio had a far better time that day than all other HackFesters -- perhaps combined -- as is clearly represented by the exhuberant, utterly captivated looks on their depixilated faces.
Although they were in a cemetery (Gettysburg National) surrounded by the sad sight of several thousand Union soldiers' graves, this quartet of cousins still managed to smile for the camera. Immediately after this pose, however, they all reverted to glum, heartbroken lasses wholly disturbed by the senselessness of war and deeply perplexed about the overweening futility of life in general. Then we all went to dinner.
Maggie in the Morning
HackFest 2004. Just emerged from a night of slumber in her lavish Four Seasons' suite, young Maggie attempts to cope with the intense Pennsylvania morning sun. Although she was stumbling and bumbling at this early hour (it was just 10:45 or so), a cigarette and a mug of strong coffee soon perked her right back up.
Although HackFest '04 is now well behind us, it behooves us to pause and reflect on that event from time to time...Here, JP instructs Logan as to the proper way to eat home fries: First, primer the mouth by taking a goodly swig of ketchup, holding bottle in right hand. Then with left hand, grab a few fries and insert them in the mouth to co-mingle with the ketchup. Swish, chew, and swallow. Repeat as necessary.
This Mennonite Ice-Making Machine (only 25 cents a pop!) was just one of the many rare and wonderful artifacts found on the premises of the charming Four Seasons Motel in Quentin, PA. HackFest '04 headquarters for the first three days of our annual gathering, the motel also had authentic Shaker vibrating beds and Amish pillowcases that were handwashed using an old-fashioned corrugated scrub board that doubled as a musical instrument on Saturday nights at the community hoedown.
If you're now inclined to learn more about Gettysburg, and the three-day skirmish that gave this small town its place in history, take a look at the above link, which provides a very comprehensive overview.
The Shroud of Stephen
HackFest '04. Wearing a replacement set of contacts, the beshrouded one, little Stevie Marion, makes his somnolent way past the paparazzi while personal chauffeur MJ, still energetic despite his epic six-hour roundtrip journey back home from Quentin, PA, pulls double-duty as doorman. Amazingly, during his brief return to Newton after his son's ocular mishap at Hershey Park in the opening minutes of our annual gathering, MJ managed to: 1.) take an early morning 10-mile run 2.) play a quick 9 at Blairstown and 3.) make a cauldron of ham and bean soup (from scratch!) before heading back to HF '04 Headquarters at the Four Seasons. He later collapsed into his side salad at dinner, but a quick-thinking and robust Mennonite waitress performed mouth to mouth, which quickly revived him. And young Stephen? He remained encased in his comforter during this entire odyssey, storing up energy for his next adolescent feeding frenzy (AKA, breakfast).
Surrounded by unceasing reminders of the Battle of Gettysburg in the Cashtown Inn parlor, Steve engages in his own battle to remain awake, as he peruses The Secret Strategies for Taking Little Round Top, Part I by Professor Leo T. Shitinski. The book has proven to be a virtual cure for insomnia, as anybody who cracks it open is certain to be completely shut-eyed in three minutes or less, depending upon the time of day. A wonderful addition to your nightstand.
